At O’Hare

From Bliss She Will Fall by P3T3R-KURT3N-GROUPI3

Tuesday, December 22, 2009:

Normally O’Hare is business-like, with men and women scurrying about.  Today it’s packed with holiday travellers in good spirits.  Security lines are long but friendly. 

A tall, slender, 25-ish male with wrap-around sunglasses strides past.  With an effeminate gait, his arms are somewhat out-stretched and seemingly float up and down.  His shoulder bag is a reddish-brown and his fingernails are painted cyan-blue.

I sit at a counter and intend to order a Chicago-style hot dog.  The withered 60-ish woman sitting next to me slams down beers.

My overweight, 40-something Mexican bartender/server ignores me and takes orders from new arrivals standing behind me.  I finally shout my order to him.

The other bartender/server is a 60-ish Vietnam veteran with a huge stomach.  His stomach spills over his belt, causing the white lining of his pants to be exposed above the belt.  He tells an active duty soldier, young, tall, and trim, the nuances of dropping bombs from slow-flying aircraft.

Is one looking at his past?  The other, his future?

I receive the below joking email on my Blackberry phone from a new acquaintance:

“I’m at O’Hare and my flight has been delayed twice.  I’ve had 3 hours of sleep and my socks are wet and I just saw a married man I’ve been dating **With His Family**.  Please tell me your not flying United because I might just have to take you in the damn bathroom and blank your brains out ’cause I’m so frustrated right now.  I need a *RELEASE*!  Is that a crime?  Kissssses my Lover, xOxOxO.
*I’m praying for your family* God bless you, Mike Seneca.”

Seneca responds in her spirit:

“I’m on an American flight and am frantically trying to get my flight changed to United!”

Seneca thinks to the trip ahead.

He’s headed to the desert

to ask his mother

to come home

to die.

How to Read an Email

Tuesday, August 25, 2009:

Seneca received an email from a young hottie suggesting a Sugar Daddy relationship.

As if his simple charms are not enough!

After being in communication with her, he is better able to understand her original email.

Original Email:  “I am young, but have been through quite a bit in my life.”

Translation:  “I am 22, and gave up escorting two years ago.”

Original Email:  ”I want to make sure we are both comfortable.”

Translation:  “I want to be sure you can afford me.”

Original Email:  “Guys my age are not very interesting to me.”

Translation:  ”Guys my age cannot afford me.”

Original Email:  “Since my break-up with my boyfriend, I have given up drinking at parties.”

Translation:  “I’m a former alcoholic.”

Original Email:  “Maybe we can go out for dinner one of these nights, and see if we are compatible.”

 Translation:  “I REALLY GOTTA BE SURE YOU CAN AFFORD ME!”

Original Email:  ”I love being pampered, being cared for, spas, and fine dining. My ex-boyfriend never did any of that for me.”

Translation:  ”My ex-boyfriend was my pimp and he kept all the damn cash!”

Relationships

Nicole

Saturday, September 19, 2009:

Seneca: “Doc, my brother’s crazy. He thinks he’s a chicken.”

Psychiatrist: “Why don’t you turn him in?”

Seneca: “I would, but I need the eggs.”

Nicole

Relationships – irrational, crazy, and absurd, but we keep going through them because we need the eggs.

Nicole

Above remarks paraphrased from Woody Allen.

Makin’ It

Monday, February 16, 2009:

Forever hopeful of finding the right woman for an intense relationship, he now realizes that just isn’t going to happen.  He’s got to make it with what’s available.

Lida is the balm to his pain.  His 19-year-old roommate spends much time with him.  They have become emotionally close.  The relationship will never be full but, with her alone, he can get through the days and the weeks ahead.

Roxanne (27) is the Golden Retriever with whom he loves to spend time.  Although stripper-girl expensive, she’s a joy.  Romantically, she isn’t into men.  Hey!  He isn’t either! 

Jade (31) is potent and could be in the picture for top honors.  He’s not sure how often she will choose to see him.

In the weeks ahead, it’s Lida for the all-important emotional closeness and Roxanne and Jade for going out and doing things.

He’s happy with that plan!

The dynamic duo, Reena and Lida, have made him aware of the raw animal magnetism of muscled males.  It’s all they think about. 

“BRAINS!!!  WE DON’T NEED NO STINKIN’ BRAINS!!!” 

He must enter a strenuous workout program.  He believes that will win Adriana back.  The guy just won’t stop in his delusions!

His failure with women is somewhat (very somewhat!) compensated by his ability to do well in school.  He will commence a class at the greatest university on the planet on April 1 and in that class he will read four French novels.  He admits he has a crush on the instructor (who happens to be a full professor).  The instructor is a very rare creature, possessing both the body and the brilliance of a Divinity.  How do they build ‘em like that!!!  The instructor writes:

In this class we will read four famous nineteenth-century French novels, all of which can be described as “psychological” rather than “realistic”: Benjamin Constant’s Adolphe (1816), Stendhal’s Red and Black (1831), Flaubert’s Sentimental Education (1869), and Maupassant’s Bel-Ami (1885).  Each novel displays its author’s wisdom about human relationships as well as his aesthetic subjectivity.  In our discussions, we will try to discern deeper connections between human psychology and the unencumbered genre of the novel.  In addition, we will pay special attention to the historical and cultural circumstances that gave birth to these masterpieces.

Seneca’s plan includes a woman-child with whom to be emotionally close (hmmm, might be a little flaw in the plan there!), a couple of hotties with whom to go out, physical activity, and the Life of the Mind.  The plan omits sex.

It is what it is!

Not Ready for Prime Time

“Heidi Sea” from TitusPowell.com

Saturday Evening, February 7, 2009:

The intrepid Seneca fears little,

except……..

except……..

dating an age-appropriate woman!

Recent weeks have seen him cancel such misadventures out of sheer terror.

His new live-in 19-year-old Lida, perfection herself, wanted him to take her to dinner at Sushi Wabi followed by a performance at the Black Ensemble Theater.   He cannot imagine an evening more perfect.  Instead, he decided to honor his previous commitment to an age-appropriate woman.  He HAD to try this just once!

His age-appropriate woman didn’t like him! 

Inquiring about his living situation, the woman seemed perturbed by the fact that he is living with two 19-year-olds and one 28-year-old.  He forgot to mention that all three take their clothes off for a living.

“What?  Did you say none of them pay rent?

She was constantly judging him, and judging him negatively.   Guess that’s what women who want to get married do.

Seneca was hell-bent on dating an age-appropriate woman, and overlooked the usual measures taken before a new date………

like getting her photo!

She bamboozled him with the statement that she performs in the theater, a sure trick that will ensnare him.  He didn’t demand the photo.

She has short hair.  It seemed unwashed and ungroomed. 

Her face is pretty with big blue eyes and kissable lips. 

She is obese.  When sitting, her tummy sticks out farther than her tits. 

She does not manicure her nails. 

Her clothes are very cheap.  She must work hard for little money. 

He tried.

He failed.

Never has one man

done so much

in a quest

for personal rehabilitation!

He may stick with Mary (23) for raw passion, Roxanne (27) of Scores for a classy woman to date but without sex, Jade (31) for sharing feelings with an adult hottie but without commitment, his two live-in 19-year-old stripper-girls for staving off loneliness, Anastasia (37) for friendship, and Mika (23)  for whom he will continue his almost three years of pining.  The two most important blog subjects, Adriana (21) and Maggie (37), seem to have fallen out of the picture.

It’s a life, I guess.

“Hot Zinzy Rhodes” from TitusPowell.com

Thoughts on a Saturday Night

megie by deypoumtchak

Late Saturday Evening, September 27, 2008:

At midnight, he points the beast south.  He had forgotten to eat today in his frenzy to find a date for the Black Ensemble Theater and in his melancholy over a love gone wrong.  He had just dropped Christina off, and she didn’t feel like eating or spending any time with him.  Starving, he remembers the great Italian sausage sandwiches and greasy fries at Ricobene’s.  He hadn’t been there since college in what was eons of time ago.

The car’s GPS system delivers him to a location on 26th Street that did not look familiar.  Nothing seems as it was in his college days, except the lack of parking. 

He looks for a glass walk-up window manned by a boy in a white t-shirt and white paper cap.  There should be boys standing behind the walk-up window, cooking and assembling orders. 

Where are the young Italian girls with gobs of dark hair in banana curls?  They should be milling about outside, sipping sodas, showing off creamy thighs. 

The Italian girls are gone!

He just cannot find the walk-up window.  Has it been replaced with this real restaurant sporting the same name? 

He is delighted to find that the fries still come in a brown paper bag dripping with grease.

But with way less salt,

and way less grease!

As a student of engineering, he knew everything, and was certain that everything worth knowing could be expressed in an equation.

He never did have women figured out.

His dreams were of big-block fire-breathing Corvettes and huge Cadillacs gliding down Michigan Avenue. He would live those dreams in the not-too-distant future.  He would have given his soul for a Triumph Bonneville motorcycle.

Tonight, returning to his car, he is startled to be reminded that his world is now of large German sedans and ferocious Porsche RSR’s, cars built of Krupp steel getting the job done with surgical precision.

A MBA at a top school allowed him to understand business and function well in the business world.  Coupled with his engineering degree, he was able to earn a decent living.

An immersion into classical texts, especially the ancient Greeks, at that same top university, caused him to know that he really didn’t know anything.  That immersion continues today.

He never did have women figured out.

He had been trying to get together with Christina for a couple of months.  She’s about 30 and sexy with a womanly body.  She has been destroyed by some earlier trauma.  During the wildly enthusiastic and uplifting “Teddy Pendergrass Story”, she is rigid and unsmiling.  He’s glad to drop her off early.

His college dreams

of performance street cars,

racing a Porsche around the country,

and long-distance motorcycle trips

have been fulfilled.

He still doesn’t have women figured out.

Tonight, thinkin’ about

where he’s been

and where he’s goin’,

he realizes

that sweet Melissa……..

the ever-so-sweet Melissa……..

his beloved Melissa……..

will never come home……..

no, never come home……..

Omigod!, she’ll never come home.

I’ll always love you, honey.

 

The New Nuclear Family

Trash by frauplanlos

Thursday Evening, January 15, 2009:

Natalie wants to spend the night at the home of her new friend, the Pseudo-Daughter.  Both girls are 19.

Natalie’s Mom drops Natalie off, but first wants to meet the Pseudo-Parents. 

She’s a good Mom!

The Pseudo-Mom is the first to greet Natalie’s Mom.  With a skinny body, huge blue eyes, and fat titties partially exposed by her trademark hot-pink top, the Pseudo-Mom is a fine example of American womanhood.

Natalie’s Mom likes the Pseudo-Mom.  Although the Pseudo-Mom is quiet and seemingly preoccupied, she thinks someone that pretty must have her act together!

The Pseudo-Dad warmly welcomes Natalie and her Mom.  He assures Natalie’s Mom that Natalie will be just fine.  “What does Natalie like to eat for breakfast?”  Did anyone notice his sly smile and his raised eyebrows?  Did he notice Natalie’s long, black hair, liquid eyes, and pretty little bottom? 

Natalie’s Mom leaves unconcerned about Natalie’s safety, but does wonder about the age-difference between the Pseudo-Mom and the Pseudo-Dad! 

But they seem like such nice people!

And the Pseudo-Daughter is so cute!

The two 19-year-olds throw fluffy blankets and pillows on the living room floor, in front of the TV.  Natalie does admire the Pseudo-Daughter’s body, not realizing she takes her clothes off for a living.

The Pseudo-Mom hurries into her bedroom, nauseated with aching joints.  If she can just get another call, she can buy the stuff that’ll cure her dope-sickness.

The Pseudo-Dad decides not to leave a trail of chocolates leading to his bedroom.  He runs to his computer to type the story of the escort he chauffered around all evening.

Where’s your daughter sleeping tonight?

d  by frauplanlos

The Finest People

“Family Values” by P3T3R KURT3N GROUPI3

Saturday, January 10, 2009:

Reena forwarded this to me.  It was written by someone else:

The finest people are those who have known

defeat,

suffering,

struggle,

and loss,

and who have found their way

out of the Depths of the Abyss.

These people have an

appreciation,

sensitivity,

and an understanding of life

that fills them with

compassion,

gentleness,

and a deep loving concern for others.

Their humanity has been forged

in the Cauldron of Life.

A Day in the Life

Geanna Herself

Monday, December 1, 2008:

Living with wild women does have its negatives!

8:30 am:  Depart for DCFS-ordered out-patient treatment for Sandy.  One hour round-trip.

1:00 pm:  Depart for probation officer meeting in front of the judge for Reena.  Her progress is to be evaluated as she recently violated her probation.  One hour meeting, primarily with the probation officer, while Seneca waits.  One hour round trip driving.  Two hours total.

3:00 pm:  Depart to pick-up Geanna and drive her to the train station.  45 minutes total.

4:00 pm:  Depart to pick-up Sandy at out-patient treatment.  One hour round-trip.

7:00 pm:  Depart to take Reena to out-patient treatment.  One hour round-trip.

8:30 pm:  Depart to pick-up Reena from out-patient treatment.  One hour round-trip.

Next week, there will be competition for the no-charge taxi-cab that is Seneca.  “Badder” has morning court on Monday for violation of her probation.

The sparkle of Geanna’s personality

makes it worth it,

let alone her looks.

And Reena’s looks makes

everything worthwhile!

The Return to His Center

The Sky Is at My Feet by bengiz

Saturday Afternoon, September 6, 2008:

He has completed the Four-Year Basic Program and has continued with courses open to Alumni.  Additional courses included Tolstoy, Pushkin, Euripides, and an intensive reading of Aristotle’s “Ethics”.

Having not been in class since the Winter, he is feeling listless and without center.  There is something about these courses that ground him and keep him in touch with what is beautiful and what is important.

As he enters the beautiful building near Michigan and the River, where he takes his classes, a calm befalls him.  This is his home.  This is his reality.  The loss of Adriana has caused him to lose his path.  The University is his Light, and leads the Way.

The lecture today is as expected – beautiful, gentle, brilliant, filled with the insights of a full Professor at one of the world’s major universities.

He is at Home.

He begins to feel centered once again.

He has already signed up for Creative Writing.  He is also considering “Asian Classics”, another four-year commitment.

But he is at Home!

The next four months, until Chloe leaves with his heart, appear to be work, school, pumping iron, and Chloe. 

He is entirely satisfied with his prospects.

The below describes the Four-Year Basic Program, already completed, and is copied from the University’s description of the Program:

“The great books do not yield up their secrets to the immature…Most of the important things that humans beings ought to understand cannot be comprehended in youth…To read the great books, if we read them at all, in childhood and youth and never read them again is never to understand them.”
-Robert Maynard Hutchins

“What is truth?  What is the meaning of life?  How can we achieve justice?  Engage in riveting discussion;  grapple with the classic texts of the Basic Program curriculum at the University.  Discuss how Plato viewed Truth.  Debate Marx’s thoughts on Justice. Contemplate Shakespeare’s musings on Love.”

“The Basic Program is four-year program in which students explore the classics of the Western tradition, from Homer to Lincoln, Aquinas to Pascal. Readings include philosophy, drama, fiction, poetry, politics, and history.  All classes are discussion style: students, led by an experienced and knowledgeable instructor, uncover and interpret the texts for themselves.   Through guided, close reading and rich, lively discussions with other reflective adults, Basic Program students gain insight into the origin of Western ideas and culture, discover deep resonance in human experience across centuries, and wrestle with provocative challenges to modern thought.”