Emily Lynn
Sunday, September 21, 2008:
Okay! Okay! I’m human!
It’s been FOREVER since I’ve been with a woman, in that way, and I took a chance. I NEVER get a response to these ads placed by attached women, as the woman is generally inundated with responses from stud muffins!
Her Craigslist ad included the following words:
“I also love a man that embraces his sensual side and is very giving to his lover, in fact, I demand it. I am, however, not looking for a strictly sexual relationship.”
Yeah! Right!
I email my usual response on September 5 and forget about it. The Craigslist response rate is 1% or 2%, and I’m always astonished to get a return email.
Two weeks later, she responds, causing the below thoughts:
Whaaa???
You’re the one looking for the sexual relationship, right?
Did you mean to contact me?
You did?
OMIGOD!!!
Did you look at my photo?
You did???
OMIGOD!!!
Yeah, the photo’s current!
Guys who phony-up photos don’t send something like THAT!!!
At the time, “I Am Who I Am” was still running at the Black Ensemble Theater. I invite her to a Sunday matinee and she accepts. If Kevin and Rashawn, the two stars, can’t get her in the mood, then nothing can!
I pick her up at a Starbucks and think “Wow! She looks pretty good!”. She fails to flee in terror, and I take that as a good sign!
Sitting next to her in the theater, I look at how pretty and soft her hands appear to be and I so love her French manicure. Her left hand is on her knee, near my right hand, and I gently touch the back of her hand with the back of my fingers. She grabs my hand, with my palm up, and puts her palm over mine, her forearm against my forearm.
Geez! This woman means business!
She then presses her left leg against my right leg.
My dates normally don’t go like this.
We have a great dinner at Sushi Wabi, and I learn that her fiancé lives in Perth, Australia. She says a woman has her needs!
Yeah! Right!
I can’t believe this is happening to me. I only read about this stuff.
You took so long to contact me because you’ve been seeing others who responded?
You felt no chemistry with them?
You do feel something with me?
My head is spinning!
Walking to the car, leaving Sushi Wabi, I stop and give her a real kiss. She likes it. And I’ve been out of practice so long!
We head to a bar of her choosing and talk more. Before I drop her off at home, we sit in the car and do what a woman wants to do when her fiancé is on the other side of the planet. I look at her face and see her passion. I just can’t believe she knows she’s with me. I notice her eyes open just a little, exposing two narrow slits of whiteness. She’s into this!
She says we’ll meet for dinner in just two days, Tuesday, and, after dinner, I need to “host”.
OMIGOD!!!
This woman plans to take me to heaven in just two days!
I am ecstatic!
But,
but,
but then I wake up Monday morning.
I think of how empty I feel after casual sex.
Yes! I can remember that far back.
I know that I really don’t have feelings for this woman.
And,
and,
and what a loser I am!
I think I still belong to Adriana.
Yeah.
I know.
I cannot bear to face this woman,
and tell her,
so I text her cancelling Tuesday.
She explodes at me in two phone conversations,
and at least it’s over.
It was very flattering to be picked by an attractive woman as a sex partner.
It did pick up my self-esteem a little.
Yeah! Right!
